Miley: “Dad I have something for Tanners bug collection”
my uncle: “that’s great”
Miley: “it’s a bird”
my uncle: “no its not”
They let it go and it flew away just fine, so we’re wondering how she caught it.
she caught another bird.
update: she caught a squirrel today
She is gonna rule the world one day with this power
Shakespeare would seriously laugh so hard if he found out how seriously people take his works. Like, he would probably cry from laughing so hard if you told him that his plays were considered high-brow literature. “It’s all dick jokes and sword fights,” he’d say, “do they seriously tell my dick jokes to schoolchildren? And the kids aren’t allowed to laugh? Do the teachers know they’re telling dick jokes? Oh my god that’s fucking hilarious. Wait until I tell Anne.”
a guide for people who can’t tell the 90s from the early 2000s apart
- if people are dressed in neon, it’s the 90s
if people are dressed in space age metallics, it’s the 2000s
That’s a cute foot fetish you got there, would you mind keeping it 25796323689432 feet away from me?
25796323689432 feet you say?
this is literally my favorite post on tumblr